More fun facts about ancient Celtic marriage laws: There were no laws against interclass or interracial marriage, no laws against open homosexual relationships (although they weren’t considered ‘marriages’ since the definition of a marriage was ‘couple with child’), no requirement for women to take their husband’s names or give up their property, but comedians couldn’t get married
It’s Adam and Eve not Adam Sandler and Eve
Harry Potter au where Harry didn’t lose being a parsletongue and Albus buys a snake as a pet one year because snakes are cool and one day just walks in on Harry and the snake having a deep conversation
*picks up broom*
"TELL THEM HOW I AM DEFYYYYYYYYYING GRAAAAAVITTYYYY"
*starts sweeping broom sadly*
"There is a castle on a cloud…"
*holds broom horizontally*
"Never need a reason, never need a rhyme. Up on the roof top step in time!"
*sweeps broom angrily*
"IT’S A HARD KNOCK LIFE!"
*begins waltzing with broom* I could have DAAAAANCED all NIIIIIGHT